- She's... She's a demon, Sam. - Meg.
Remember me? I sure remember you, Clarence.
I learned that from the pizza man.
She's running. You're running from Crowley.
My name is Naomi. We rescued you.
They're controlling us, Castiel.
Kill him. This is a direct order.
What did I just do?
- Tell the Winchesters Samandriel was... - Compromised.
- You acted in... - Self-defense.
Cass, you okay?
There's another tablet? So another word of God.
The Angel Tablet, Castiel. Crowley knows.
God built a series of tests. You do all three, slam the gates of hell.
Sam, I didn't pass a test.
But I did, and I'm doing the rest of them.
Cass, you got your ears on? You keep a lookout for my little brother, okay?
No.
No, Cass, no.
No, Cass, don't, please.
No hesitation, quick, brutal.
Everything's back in order.
Finally...
you're ready.
What the hell is this?
"Spear of Destiny"?
What, is this God's toothpick?
Would it have killed these ass-hats to label these boxes...
in something other than hieroglyphics?
It's ridiculous.
Hey, you listening to me?
Yeah, it's, ahem, fascinating stuff.
You should probably write it all down in your journal for the archives, you know?
Yeah, thanks. You're a lot of help.
Hey, Doc Holliday, you all right over there?
Uh, yeah, yeah, I'm fine. Just wrong pipe.
Well, hello.
These Men of Letters weren't so boring after all.
- Hey, check this out. - What is wrong with you?
You kidding me? This is a first edition.
- Know what this would go for on eBay? - No. Why? Do you?
No. Maybe.
Shut up. You find anything?
I did, yeah. Uh, dead bodies showing up all over the Midwest last week.
Benton, Indiana, Downers Grove, Illinois, Novi, Michigan...
and then again last night in Lincoln Springs, Missouri.
And how is this us?
Each victim had severe burns around their eyes, hands and feet...
puncture wounds through their hands...
eyes and internal organs liquefied.
- That sounds like us. - Yeah.
Also no link between any of the victims.
One was a real-estate agent. Another was a local historian.
- Woman killed last night was a teacher. - So chupacabra.
What do we got, power tools gone rogue?
Wait, are we talking a Maximum Overdrive situation here?
I don't know. Worth a shot, though.
I'll grab my gear. We should probably leave in five.
Unless, of course, you need some more time with Miss October.
What?
Oh.
Yeah. Yeah, make it ten.
We just have a few routine follow-up questions about your wife, sir.
Did she have any enemies?
Ann? Honestly, I can't think of a soul who'd want to hurt her.
- Even after everything that happened. - Everything that happened?
About a week ago something changed in Ann.
She was out of sorts, not herself at all.
Out of sorts how?
It'll be better if I show you.
She stopped sleeping. She stopped eating.
She went out in the middle of the night going God knows where.
I tried to talk to her, but she would just mutter to herself.
About what?
Something about an orchard.
Finally I just followed her one night, and she went to the playground.
Over here, the elementary school.
And she started digging.
She'd leave with these little bags full of dirt.
Hung them here.
All these bags represent holes that she dug in the ground.
Were these holes, I don't know, 6 feet deep?
No. She dug for hours. She never broke a sweat.
Straight down 10, maybe 15 feet.
Did you notice anything else?
I didn't say anything to the cops...
because I didn't want them to think I was crazy.
After Ann came home...
I came down here to confront her and she was on the phone.
- Any idea who she was talking to? - No.
But I know what I saw.
And it wasn't my Annie.
After I called her out, her eyes, they turned black.
Now, I know I must have imagined it. I know I did.
But I left, I went to the bar, probably had too much to drink...
and by the time I came back...
my Annie was...
I should have stayed.
I should have protected her.
I'm moving into my sister's place today.
I can't be here anymore.
Sure.
Well, thank you very much for your time.
We're both very sorry for your loss.
So somebody's killing demons. That is awesome.
- We should send a card or flowers. - What flower says:
"Thanks for killing demons"?
Yeah, but who's killing demons and why?
By the way, since when does a demon possess someone...
then go all Beautiful Mind and start digging in the dirt?
Does any of this seem right?
I like the part about killing demons. That sounds right.
Sure, of course. Well, thank you very much for all your help.
I really appreciate the time. All right. Bye.
So real-estate guy's wife said he was acting weird.
Historian's hubby said the same. Just got all obsessive and then weird.
No one saw any black eyes, but still, where there's smoke, you know.
Wonder what they're all looking for.
Wendy Rice here was the last person to speak with Ann...
so let's see if she can tell us.
Agent Lynne. This is my partner, Agent Tandy.
We'd like to ask you a few questions about Ann Morton.
Oh. Of course. Please, come in.
I had never met her before she called the other night.
Now, why was she calling you?
She was looking to find an original map of the city.
Did she say what for?
Well, she didn't, but she did mention an old orchard that had gone missing.
Missing?
This town was wiped from the earth by one of the river's 100-year floods.
Well, it was rebuilt, but all the original records were lost.
I'm a PhD candidate.
And this is my research. I...
My dissertation is on the history of this town...
and its connection to the Underground Railroad and whatnot.
I've been working to re-create a map for years as part of my research.
And this, this is the old Jakubiak Orchard there.
I found out yesterday it's where Downey meets Bond Street.
Now, did Ann say why she was looking for the site of an old orchard?
No.
We set a time to meet and she never showed.
Then I read about her in the paper.
It's just tragic.
Ann's assistant called this morning, though, asking if I still had the map.
Assistant?
That's probably him. Maybe he can help.
Oh. Are you...?
Put this on your shoulder.
I'm fine.
The other demon escaped. I bound the one I caught in a devil's trap.
- I'll interrogate it now. - Wait a second. Cass.
How about you answer some questions first?
Like, where the hell have you been?
You heard me, didn't you?
You prayed to him?
Yes, I heard you.
But that's not why I'm here.
I've been hunting demons.
So this is you.
- Why? - What should I tell them?
The truth.
Most of it, anyway.
Maybe they can get us closer.
I'm searching for the other half...
- of the Demon Tablet. - Without us?
I've been trying to help, Dean.
And in my search, I uncovered that Crowley has sent out demons...
- to find Lucifer's Crypts. - Lucifer had crypts?
Dozens of them, apparently.
But why the storage wars? What are they all looking for?
It would be more helpful if they knew everything.
- They cannot be trusted. - But...
Lie, Castiel.
Tell them what we discussed.
They're looking for a parchment that would allow them...
to decipher Crowley's half of the Demon Tablet without a prophet.
A demonic decoder ring in Crowley's hands? Awesome.
The crypts were lost over time.
Only those closest to Lucifer knew their whereabouts.
Then how did Crowley find them?
His demons have been possessing locals who may have some special knowledge.
That would explain the crazy room at Ann's house.
- How did they know where to look? - I don't know.
I'm hoping the strange-haired demon in the kitchen...
is more knowledgeable than the others I interrogated.
- Well, he puts the "ass" in "Cass," huh? - He's definitely off.
Off? He hasn't been right since he got back from purgatory.
We still don't know how he got out of there.
I don't know, Dean. If he's so sketchy, then why were you praying to him?
You know, I can hear you both. I am a celestial being.
Sam and Dean Winchester. Heh.
Oh, the thoughts she had about you two.
Mostly you, Sam.
What can I say?
She has a thing for smutton chops.
All right, you douchebag, listen...
Who told you about the crypts?
I thought angels were supposed to be the good cops.
Wait, stop.
Stop.
We have a hostage.
It's one of Crowley's pets.
She's at the Murray Hotel down by the interstate. She knows the towns...
where all the crypts are buried. She saw them back in the day.
And she told you about the parchment?
What parchment?
Hey, hey.
Think he's the only bad cop in this room?
Stop lying. We know what you're really looking for.
- No, I am telling you, we're looking... - Kill it.
- For... - Cass.
- What? - It told us what we needed.
- No, she didn't... - I started this hunt without you.
I didn't want anything to slow me down.
- We have to get to the motel now. - Hold on a second...
- Cass. - Cass? Cass? Damn it. Go, go, go.
There, there.
Thanks for waiting.
The hostage is in there.
Aren't you a little short for a Stormtrooper?
So I gotta ask.
What's up with the hair?
What?
Thanks for noticing, Dean.
But this wasn't my idea. It was Crowley's.
And it's just another reason I want to stab him in the face.
Wait a second.
You've been telling Crowley the location of Lucifer's Crypts.
What can I say? I needed a break from the constant torture.
And I did visit them all during my time with Yellow Eyes.
But don't worry. I haven't exactly been giving them the Glengarry leads.
- You mean you've been lying to them? - I just get them in the ballpark.
Enough time's passed and enough's changed that they bought it.
Why lie?
Buy myself some time, dummy.
Try to find a way to get free.
Wait, so a bunch of innocent people died so you could buy yourself some time?
Hi. I'm Meg. I'm a demon.
So, what have they found?
Bubkes. Every crypt's been one Al Capone's vault after another.
And on top of that, someone kept picking up the trail and icing demons.
I'm guessing that was you, Castiel.
But Crowley just keeps sending more. He's hell-bent on...
She's gonna tell them the truth.
Do I have to kill her?
She does know the location of the crypts.
But working with a demon is unclean.
Well, we could use her as Crowley did.
Agreed.
Finding that Angel Tablet.
Wait a second.
Did you just say "Angel Tablet"?
You know, I get why Crowley calls you Moose now.
Yes, Angel Tablet.
Crowley found out Lucifer had it, figures it's stashed in a crypt.
Well, this is news to me, as well.
Demons I interrogated must have been lying about their true intentions.
Really?
Because I saw you Zero Dark Thirty that demon.
You were more than persuasive.
You're both missing the point.
I lied to them, which means they're digging in the wrong place.
But not for long. They'll be back here soon.
- So who's up for fleeing? - She's right.
We need to find those crypts before they do. Meg...
you're the only one who's been there.
We need your help.
Any of you dummies got a map?
- There, that's where the crypt was. - What's there now?
Do I look like Google to you?
None of these buildings were here way back in the day.
Figure it out, genius.
Is there any booze in this dump?
- He lied to us. - Yeah, maybe.
But I can kind of understand why. I mean, an Angel Tablet?
If the Demon Tablet shuts the gates of hell, what can the Angel Tablet do?
These wounds have festered.
You really do know how to make a girl's nethers quiver, don't you?
I am aware of how to do that.
Although it doesn't usually involve cleaning wounds.
Why are you so sweet on me, Clarence?
I don't know.
And I still don't know who Clarence is.
Would it kill you to watch a movie, read a book?
A movie, no.
But a book with the proper spells, yeah, could theoretically kill me.
You know, you're much cuter when you're shutting up.
So which Cass are you now?
Original make and model or crazy town?
I'm just me.
So your noodle's back in order?
Yeah, my noodle remembers everything.
- I think it's a pretty good noodle. - Really?
You remember everything?
If you're referring to the pizza man...
yes, I remember the pizza man.
And it's a good memory.
Here goes.
All right, according to this...
the crypt has to be below an abandoned building.
Good times.
You really think we can trust Meg-stiel?
No, but what choice do we have?
You ever miss the apocalypse?
No, why would I miss the end of times?
I miss the simplicity.
I was bad. You were good. Life was easier.
Now it's all so messy.
I'm kind of good, which sucks.
And you're kind of bad...
which is actually all manner of hot.
We survive this, I'm gonna order some pizza...
and we're gonna move some furniture around. You understand?
No, I...
Wait, actually, yes, I...
All right. Let's roll, campers.
Sir?
I searched the site top to bottom.
It's empty.
No, there's no crypt there.
And that's not all.
It's just me now, sir. I...
We may have lost Meg.
Sir?
Hello, sir?
Just to be clear...
you can't find a hole in the ground...
your coworkers have met with an untimely demise...
and you've lost my favorite chew toy.
Brilliant.
What's that old expression?
"If you want something done right..."
Blah, blah, blah.
So this is it. Basement?
Cass and I will head in, get our Indiana Jones on.
Sam, stay outside with Meg.
- What? - We got this.
What? I'm not letting you go in there alone.
- He won't be alone. - That's not what I mean.
Meg can hang here, watch our backs.
- Oh, what? Now you trust Meg? - Hey, I got you this far.
- Shut up... - Shut up, Meg. Dean...
Sam, I saw your bloody rag in the trash can, okay?
- That wasn't... - Stop.
Just stop. Sam, we don't know what's in there.
Okay? You almost let a demon get the best of you back there.
- I'm fine. - No, you haven't been since the first trial.
- That's why I called Cass. - Trial?
- Shut up, Meg. - Shut up, Meg.
Dean, I'm telling you, I'm okay.
No, you're not.
Sam...
you're damaged in ways even I can't heal.
Dean's right. You should stay here and protect Meg.
Since when do I need protecting?
Since you were held captive and tortured for over a year.
Touché.
All right, we'll be back.
Hey, what did you mean back there about Sam?
It's difficult to say. It's something on the subatomic level.
- And his electromagnetic field... - Okay, bottom-line it for me, Bill Nye.
- Is it lethal? - I don't know. Wait.
There's a draft.
There's something behind there.
Stand back.
Wait, so I took how many bullets for you guys...
and you didn't even look for me?
Like, once?
My hero.
What's with all the "trial" and "being damaged" crap?
Look, no disrespect, but you haven't exactly been...
the most trustworthy person in our lives, Meg.
You're not gonna tell me?
Seriously? How am I not Team Sam?
Fine.
Whatever it is, you okay dying over it?
You don't want to say, fine.
But remember, I spent time in that walking corpse of yours.
I know your sad little thoughts and feelings.
That's creepy.
Here's what I remember.
Deep down in parts you never let see the light of day...
you want to live a long normal life away from creepy old things like me.
Yeah, I do.
You know, I spent last year with someone...
and now I know that's actually possible.
Wait, that's how you spent your last year?
With a chick? Lame.
You know, how about we just wait quietly?
What was her name?
You don't even trust me with a name?
Cut me, do I not bleed, Sam?
So some chick actually got you off hunting, huh?
That's one rare creature.
Tell me, how'd you meet this unicorn?
I found it.
Tell the Winchester the crypt is empty, then come back for it.
- It's warded against angels. - You can come back...
Crowley's demons are still in town. We're running out of time. What should I do?
Handle it.
Dean...
that's it.
How do you know?
It's the only thing in here warded against angels.
Winner, winner, chicken dinner.
Good.
Hand it to me and I'll take it to heaven.
No, we will take it to Kevin so he can translate.
Right.
Of course, I'll take it to him right away.
No time to waste.
Well, he's not that far.
I've been meaning to go check on him, bring him some supplies.
If the demons get their hands on the Angel Tablet...
they'll kill us all. They'll destroy heaven.
I can reason with Dean.
- He's a good man. - Kill him.
I can resupply the prophet, Dean.
You know, why don't Sam and I take it over to him...
and you can get back to your mission?
Finding the other half of the Demon Tablet, that is priority, isn't it?
I can't let you take that, Dean.
Can't or won't?
Both.
How did you get out of purgatory, Cass?
There has to be another way.
You have done this a thousand times, Castiel.
You're ready.
Kill him. Then take the tablet and bring it home where it belongs.
Just tell me how you got out of purgatory.
Be honest with me for the first time since you've been back...
and this is yours.
Wait, hold on. There's one part I don't understand.
You hit a dog and stopped. Why?
That whole story, and that's your takeaway?
Oh, I heard the rest.
You fell in love with a unicorn. It was beautiful, then sad, then sadder.
I laughed, I cried, I puked in my mouth a little.
And honestly, I kind of get it.
Really?
We've got company.
Cass, Cass, I don't know what the hell is wrong with you...
but if you're in there and you can hear me, you don't have to do this.
Cass.
- This isn't right. - Do you realize...
- what that tablet can do for us? - I...
- For heaven? - I won't hurt Dean.
Yes, you will.
- You are. - Cass, fight this. This is not you.
Fight it.
What have you done to me?
Just relax, Castiel.
Let your vessel do what you know deep down is the right thing.
What have you done to me, Naomi?
- Who's Naomi? - What have I done to you?
Do you have any idea what it's like out there?
There's blood everywhere, and it's on your hands.
After everything you did to us, to heaven.
I fixed you, Castiel. I fixed you.
Cass.
I believe they're playing my song.
You want it, take it.
But you're gonna have to kill me first.
Come on, you coward.
Do it. Do it.
- Please. - End this, Castiel.
Cass, this isn't you. This isn't you.
Bring me the tablet.
Cass. Cass.
I know you're in there.
I know you can hear me.
Cass, it's me.
We're family.
We need you.
I need you.
You have to choose, Castiel, us or them.
Cass.
Castiel.
Castiel!
Cass?
No, Cass, Cass.
I'm so sorry, Dean.
What the hell just happened?
Love what you've done with the place.
You really think all that was gonna keep me out forever?
At least long enough for Dean and Cass...
- to get the tablet and get out. - Castiel.
So that's who's been poking my boys, and not in a sexy way.
Got a bone to pick with you, Moose.
After what you did to my poor dog.
You gonna talk us to death or get down to it already?
There's my whore.
I'm not here for my dearly departed, though.
I'm here for the stone with the funny scribbles on it.
That's not gonna happen.
Love it when you get all tough.
Touches me right where my bathing suit goes.
Go.
Save your brother and my unicorn.
Timon and Pumbaa...
tell you their big plan?
Did they share that little chestnut with you?
They mean to close the gates of hell, sweetheart.
They mean to kill me and all the demons, you included.
You had me at "kill you," Crowley.
So, Naomi has been controlling you since she got you out of purgatory?
Yeah.
Well, what broke the connection?
I don't know.
I just know that I have to protect this tablet now.
- From Naomi? - Yes.
And from you.
From me? What are you talking about?
Cass?
Cass? Damn it. SAM: Dean.
- Dean. Where's Cass? - He's gone.
- Meg? - We gotta go now.
I could beat on you for eternity.
Take all the time you want, you pig.
No Cass in the backseat.
Your stone is long gone.
Naomi.
Fancy meeting you here.
Haven't seen you in a dark age.
Love the haircut.
How's the shoulder?
Just a flesh wound.
Now, I don't have the tablet.
And if you're here, neither do you.
Which means that your Castiel is in the wind with our prize.
If I didn't know you better, I'd say you're losing your touch.
Castiel isn't in the wind.
He's doing exactly what he's supposed to do...
- protect the tablet. - Even from you?
Easy, love.
If you remember our time in Mesopotamia the way I do...
you know I'm a lover, not a fighter.
What do you want, you cockroach?
Maybe we can make a deal before this gets truly bollocksed.
I mean, I must have something that you want.
Tart stole my move.
So, what happened?
I mean, Cass touched the tablet...
and it reset him to his factory settings or something?
I don't know and I don't care.
All I know is that he is off the reservation with a heavenly WMD.
Listen, man, I can't take any more lies from anyone.
Yeah. Um...
I know.
I'm sorry.
I should have told you. I just wanted to believe I was okay.
- I don't know. - You heard what Cass said.
That that first trial hurt you in ways that even he can't heal.
Sammy, I need you to be honest with me from here on out, man.
You're right.
And I will be.
I may not be able to carry the burden that comes along with these trials.
But I can carry you.
You realize you kind of just quoted Lord of the Rings, right?
Come on, man. But it's the Rudy Hobbit, all right?
Rudy Hobbit always gets a pass.
Shut up.
But I have to have things my own way
To keep me in my youth
Like a ship without an anchor
Like a slave without a chain
Just the thought of those sweet ladies
Sends a shiver through my veins